Of Saltines and Gatorade

I had some sort of food poisoning yesterday. Today, I'm able to go to work and such, but still feel a bit weak. I post the following picture because ... well, simply because it makes me smile.

Oh, to be on a desert island...

A popular show that people would love to see go on for years and years has now a specific agreed upon date on which it will end.

An unpopular war that nobody wants to see go on for any more months (let alone years) will never, ever, ever have an end date.

Understand all that? No? Me neither.

I came in for the post title. I stayed for the content.

From DailyKos's mouth to many a reporter's ears (we hope):

The first stanza of this nonsense poem looks like this:

"It makes no sense to tell the enemy when you plan to start withdrawing," Bush said. "All the terrorists would have to do is mark their calendars and gather their strength and begin plotting how to overthrow the government and take control of the country of Iraq."

If idiocy had gravity, that paragraph would collapse into a black hole. Let's take it sentence by sentence:

"It makes no sense to tell the enemy when you plan to start withdrawing." Here's a news flash -- there is no such thing as surprise withdrawal. You can't sneak 160,000 soldiers out of Iraq in the trunk of a Volvo. One day, America will leave Iraq, and when we do, we will catch no one - no one -- by surprise. Does anyone really think al Qaeda will be looking at empty blockhouses for weeks saying to themselves, "why don't those infidels come out to play?" When we start to leave, it will be broadcast on every station around the world for months in advance and there is not one damn thing anyone can do about that. Whenever any Republican advances the "we can't let them know when we're leaving line," they should follow it with an agonized scream, because stupidity that powerful ought to hurt.

"All the terrorists would have to do is mark their calendars and gather their strength and begin plotting how to overthrow the government and take control of the country of Iraq." So, knowing when we're going to depart, the terrorists would... settle down and plot while we went on about our business? Has no one noticed that this is exactly what we wanted to happen? If giving a timeline would make the terrorists sit down and check off the days like Ralphie waiting for his Red Ryder, then why not give a deadline on day one? Heck, make it an announcement "Hey, bad guys, we're going to leave in a year. In the meantime, why don't you park it some place while the government gets its act together, we repair a few power plants, get the water running, and get people used to peace."

The president is daily delivering a message that directly translates to "We plan on sneaking all our troops out of town, because otherwise they'd wait for us to leave before shooting," and no one is calling him on it. Hell, nine out of ten little tin soldiers stood up at the Republican debate to repeat this message almost word for word.

What's stanza #2 of the national nonsense?

"Al Qaeda terrorists who behead captives and order suicide bombings in Iraq would not simply be satisfied to see us gone. A retreat in Iraq would mean that they would likely follow us here."

I was only sixteen when I worked for my local weekly paper, but there were these things they taught us to ask back then -- questions they called them. Who. What. When. Maybe even why and how. Has anyone out there thought of applying these things to the tune that dutifully plays every time someone winds up the crank on Bush or McCain? Who will follow us home? How will they do that? What the holy hell have you been sniffing? The insurgents in Iraq are Iraqis, they already are home. That handful of people in Iraq who really are al Qaeda, and not just people who have adopted that name because they know it pisses us off, can not hike to America. If terrorists can really hop a jet and land in America, it's because this administration is fixated on Iraq and had done next to nothing about real problems of national security. In fact, this whole second paragraph translates as "We've done nothing to stop terrorists from coming here."

Skippy of the Day: Paul Harvey

I'm not easily shocked, but this little peek into Paul Harvey's political views really surprised me. The quote is actually from two years ago (via Think Progress), but it bears posting again so that other people know what kind of mind this legend of the airwaves has:

We didn't come this far because we're made of sugar candy. Once upon a time, we elbowed our way onto and across this continent by giving smallpox-infected blankets to Native Americans. That was biological warfare. And we used every other weapon we could get our hands on to grab this land from whomever.

And we grew prosperous. And yes, we greased the skids with the sweat of slaves. So it goes with most great nation-states, which - feeling guilty about their savage pasts - eventually civilize themselves out of business and wind up invaded and ultimately dominated by the lean, hungry up-and-coming who are not made of sugar candy.

I'm not a part of the liberal left wing that will throw around names like "Hitler" with wild abandon. Using so vilified a name on just any Republican that pisses you off will weaken your argument and immediately turn your audience off. But the way Paul Harvey easily tosses aside the treatment of Native Americans and African Americans as necessary for the building of this country, he could have easily written speeches for Der Fuhrer himself.

Here's the basic point: Sometimes your two options are to do something (A) morally right or (B) personally beneficial. If you're lucky, you have options that are both. But what Paul Harvey is basically saying is that, no matter what, this country should choose option B, because supremacy and survival are the only things that matter. Wiping out one group of people and enslaving another is fine if it benefits the country. How much closer does he have to get to the Third Reich mindset before Americans at large will cry "Foul"?

Hitler wasn't made of sugar candy, either, but he and his empire fell anyway due to bad tactics and a world community that fought against him. Liberals don't want a country made of sugar candy, Mr. Harvey, but we do want one that does what is right and just, regardless of the consequence. Sometimes doing what is right will make us weaker, but we can at least continue with a clear conscience. People like Mr. Harvey, however, do not appear to have one.

Re-read your Book of Mark: "For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?". I've always agreed that the Bible can be a great guide for living a good life. Too bad Mr. Harvey doesn't read it closely enough.

BREAKING NEWS!

Once again, Jacksonville makes the national news for unfortunate reasons:

Six men were wounded Tuesday in two separate shootings in a neighborhood near Jacksonville Municipal Stadium in downtown Jacksonville, Florida.

Investigators said they suspect the two shootings, about a block apart, are connected.

Four people sitting on a front porch were shot at the first location and two other people were shot at the second location, said Ken Jefferson, a Jacksonville Sheriff's Office spokesman. All were hit with birdshot.

Birdshot? I didn't know Dick Cheney was in town today.

Delroy Lindo Quote of the Month: May 2007

Mrs. Mosley and I saw The Hoax last week and enjoyed it very much. Richard Gere and Alfred Molina did great in their staring roles. The most surprising part of the film was that it was directed by Lasse Haalstrom, who has become famous over the years for directing Oscar-bait pictures for Miramax. Though The Hoax may yet get some awards, it dosn't give an overall feeling of wanting awards like his other films have done.

The Cider House Rules was his first Miramax film to do this. It's a solid film that will probably be most remembered as the movie that finally got Michael Caine his long-deserved Oscar. Another supporting role worth noticing is that of Arthur Rose, played by (you guessed it) Delroy Lindo. In the following scene, he gets the honor of reciting a speech that elaborates on the movie's title. And though the speech may have a touch of nobility, we learn later on that he has a darker meaning in mind.

Arthur Rose: "They outrageous, them rules. Who live in this cider house? Who grindin' up those apples, pressin' that cider, cleanin' up all this mess? Who just plain live here, just breathin' in that vinegar? Well, someone who don't live here made those rules. Those rules ain't for us. We are supposed to make our own rules. And we do. Every single day."