Friday, May 26, 2006

Never got past "C" in the hardware dictionary, I guess

A minor home repair required me to grab a couple of dowels at Lowe's, recently. The second employee I came across was nice and helpful and guided me easily to where they were. The following is the exchange with the first employee:
(Short, older man is about to move one of those rolling ladders that reaches the high shelves)

Alonzo: (kindly) "Excuse me."

(The old man turns his head and glares at me, but doesn't say a word)

Alonzo: "Could you tell me where the dowel rods are?"

(His face screws up in complete bafflement, as if I just asked him for Pi to fifty decimal places)

Old man: (shaking his head in bewilderment) "I have no idea ... What do they do again?"

Alonzo: (brief pause) "Uh, dowels ... they're wooden dowels."

Old man: "Ehh ..." (a bit of a groan, as if this question is making his head hurt) "Go down to the Millers on the other end ... all the way to the other end of the store ... They got wooden stakes down there."

Alonzo: "Uh ... Thank you."
I may know very little about construction and house repair and such, but I think I've known what a friggin dowel is since I was six. If ever I get to the point where I'm still working in a Library and am unable to correctly identify an index or a glossary, then please, please roll me the hell out of there on a gurney as soon as possible.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Loved that story. Can you say "customer service"? Don't worry--if you can't identify an index or a glossary, I'll personally drop you on a gurney and roll you West.