Golf carts of old give way to flashy golf cars
Pretty much the definition of a slow news day, huh folks?
Oh, wait. I spoke to soon. Here's a real headline:
Canada opts out of U.S. missile shield
"So, like, if you go in half with me on this used Dodge Dart I'm looking at, then I can totally drive you around and stuff. What? No, I've never gotten the thing to actually start. Huh? Yeah, all the mechanics I talked to told me that the engine block is frozen solid and the drive shaft is missing. Listen, I don't like your attitude, man. What kind of friend are you, anyway? Maple syrup loving freak!"